A Field Guide to the Aliens of Star Trek: The Next Generation, Seasons one through seven. [2017]

Zine review by Darin

            In the Spring of 1990 Los Angeles area resident Joshua Chapman completed a zine like object as a participant of a seventh grade English class. He and his mother survived the loss of his dad. His mother would otherwise have seemed to be effected by prolonged grief disorder, and / or the possibility is also that she may have had other problems as well, such as poverty, or other kinds of class, gender, economic [etc.] issues as a consequence also, maybe other mental health issues, but that is not indicated. What is clear however is that Joshua was encouraged to complete the assignment and continue it by his Junior High School Councilor, likely his English teacher, and perhaps others also as a cathartic process. Seasons two though seven were not necessarily educationally related, although he expressed distress and hopelessness towards Season Seven as he was anxious regarding his future and life after high school.

            Unfortunately other than complete his zine project he also seems to have taken up self-harm, which as the time was diagnosed as a mental health disorder known as self-mutilation. He has thoughts of death and suicide. What is clear is that he hates his mother. This is a recurrent theme in the work, and the most unattractive.

            Personally I have some relation to this on a few different levels. In terms of my own catharsis, and also my own research in the science of science fiction, a field known as Roddenburyism. I feel like my own mother, although a pioneer in the workplace of her day, essentially became a heartless capitalist. I love Star Trek, and although I was about four years older than Joshua and watched from 1987 on-wards, in my case beginning in very early high-school, recently I have also been harboring my inner child for answers in hopes of self-resolution and whatever possibility of science fiction writing I can observe for myself. I hope today's Joshua is getting as much out of the process for himself also.

            Joshua maintains at least some level of honest unadulteration in his depiction of aliens through-out the body of work. His analysis is often at least rivaling that of startrek.com, memory alpha, and beta, and startrekonline/wiki. [His views are often quite hilarious.] A least in that he amazingly and often enough times has an innocuously accurate if simple consideration. Later on especially however there are more rants and less humor. When he isn't angry at his mom, I tend to agree with his analysis, however it must be understood that there are furthering socio-dynamics at work with these episodes, and sometimes he simply would seem to be otherwise unaware or uncaring of the larger issues of the science as depicted given their complexity, and the complexity of adolescence/post-adolescence in the later 20th century. He gets it pretty well more than half of the time I would say, and it is difficult to compete with cartoons, punk rock, anarchism, dungeons and dragons, video games and hormones. Through-out he essentially rates the aliens as a viewer. This can be very funny and interesting, and frankly even if relatively an unscientific analysis, a very informed viewpoint. I'll try to range my findings to give a broad enough interpretation of his efforts.

            The Android Data, The Vulcan species, and The Borg [sentients zombified by a augment technological hive/mind,] are the only ones to receive five stars. [5*.] Joshua had a very tough time and clearly was enthusiastic in any enhanced abilities, especially emotionlessness, and showed some respect for logic. Cats are very high on his list. Data in his efforts to seem or become more humanlike had a pet cat which also receives a very high adoration by the young Joshua. Joshua loves his cat, but later in a stressful episode of angst lashes out at his cat, and then unfortunately, Joshua begins or continues self-loathing.

            I have to wish that Joshua could have enjoyed the video game Star Trek Online, especially due to the fact that the felinoid species [plural,] Ferasan, and the Caitian, with their conflicting history and the eugenics committed to the Ferasan, by the Caitian could have been some kind of point of resolution for him. Yet possibly he still can if he so chooses should need be. In this case critics would argue either that eugenics is too mature a subject for children, and/or that a violent resolution is counter intuitive. Ferasan, largely siding with the Klingons in the 25th C. enacted revenge upon Caitian eugenic scientists, despite the results being the harboring of their more instinctive, tribal, and animalistic qualities, as designed as a hope for the longevity of the species. There were likely more side-effects and that fact was not given enough detail in STO in my opinion. Revenge is a dish best served cold, yet even Klingons must observe diplomacy. Joshua actually disliked bullies and the popular kids, and that is another theme in his writing.

            Cardassians. Home Planet: Cardassia Prime. Episode: The Wounded. Rating: 4*. These aliens seem pretty sneaky, but overall they basically act like humans. It's not like how the Klingons are always super aggressive or the Ferengi are really greedy or the Betazoids are annoying losers.” He doesn't like empathy or empathic self-expression. His mom-hate gets pretty tiring.

            Even though obviously European / seemingly providential Grecian/English actress Marina Sirtis who plays the Betazed empath and ship councilor on the Enterprise, it's type casting in some sense probably. Diana Troi, half-human, and Betazed is the daughter of a diplomatically relevant household. There is a sense of prominent socio-economics, just the same I can't imagine the Sirtis family is very amused by austerity in Europe, and they likely have a ton of sympathy for their fellow citizens. Honestly Marina has a humble background. Just the same Joshua hates her character considerably. The 'mother of Science Officer Diana Troi,' is actually a kind of obnoxious character [although its kind of funny,] played by Gene Roddenbury's wife, Majel Barrett,who is actually amazingly cool on so many different levels.

            In this case what Joshua's animosity reminds me of is the episode when Dr. Beverly Crusher and Diana are talking about promotions during morning Yoga, and Diana decides to go for broke and become commander. The Lt. Commander is really going to have to work on it. Later in the episode, when Troi is doing the late shift on the bridge in order to have more command acuity, Commander Riker is leaving the bridge as she arrives and is rather dismissive; she's his long-time lover and future fiancée. So that's pretty troubling and that instance leads to another Yoga discussion. Riker has to keep a professional distance so that Troi can discover her own command structure / methodology [Prime Directive,] on her own terms [equality,] in accordance to the command structure guidelines of fleet activity within the United Federation of Planets' acclaimed Starfleet. Equality is a behavioral guideline [a kind of rule,] not an option.

            Riker later in said episode would confide to Troi that he was actually troubled for the same reasons she was, yet he still had to act like a commander. Eventually they would both be commanders, at that point in the series Riker had given up on command opportunities to stay on the Enterprise. Eventually, they would both be Captains of their own command. The future is uncertain and who knows what a deep space long distance relationship must be like.

            So yeah, to say the least young Joshua is missing points on contextual ratification. Most of the rest of these I derive from Joshua's Season six and seven. If you haven't noticed yet the alien briefs I'm transcribing from Joshua are going from best to worst first, then order of appearance, to the best of my ability.

            Cairn. Home Planet: ? Episode: Dark Page. Rating 3*. A Cairn telepath is mind bending Troi's mom, Lwaxana. This is the episode where Joshua is making a breakthrough about his mom. Even though he doesn't admonish the mind-fuck, he explains the circumstances and in other species descriptions DOES acknowledge shitty rape cultural dogma and calls the species out on it. The complexity of this episode is that Troi is somehow psychically in Troi's mom's mind trying to find out why she is injured or whatever. Cairn aren't good at speaking because they are constantly telepathic. Lwaxana was supposed to help the Cairn with speech, but PTSD regarding her child who had died proved too much. In this description it would seem that Joshua could use the lame calamity of Troi in Lwaxana's brain as a physical metaphysical manifestation as a way to identify with his own problems with his own mom. His lesson is that women [I guess he supposes,] don't take care of bullshit. I'm paraphrasing. So the bullshit keeps getting worse. He's beginning to see that there is really some serious bullshit he needs to deal with in order to prevent more bullshit from happening. 

            Naric. Episode: Gambit Pt. 1. Rating 3*. “This guy is a mercenary on Arctus Baran's ship.”...“In general I think the darker a show is, the better chance it has to being awesome, which is why all the best episodes of Star Trek are ones like Picard being turned into a Borg, or tortured by Cardassians, or stuff like that.” Joshua likes pirates and talks about cartoons to make a comparative narrative.

            Herkarans. Home Planet: Hekaras 2. Episode: Force of Nature. Rating: 3*. “These aliens have really weird forehead creases that make me uncomfortable. I don't know why but they remind me of vaginas. I know that's not what a vagina actually looks like, but still. They seem kind of sexual shaped to me.” There is an ecological concern regarding what might seem like conflict of interests regarding Starfleet's broad objectives. Josh sees a classist seeming overview. Another point of view is more relative to a strict adherence to the structural policy of the prime directive. 

            Atreans. Home Planet: Atrea 4. Episode: Inheritance. Rating: 3*. “These are aliens that have giant ears and are weirdly racist against Data.” He loved this show as a kid, but it seems like every show struck a nerve somehow. He loves Data, so A.I. discrimination is damning. It wasn't entirely clear if it was jealousy or admiration, or suspicion of technology or some kind of weird combination, based on how Atreans sound from what I can remember. In fact it might as simply be the Atrean’s way of taking Data seriously. [Or what is serious to them.] However xenophobic the Atreans, again Josh pits against his mom, by hating on Data's mom who in this episode is married to an Atrean. It could very well be that Data's Atrean step-father doesn't want trouble or something. Data is the only one originally that discovers that she is an artificial life form.

            Boraalan. Boraal 2. Episode: Homeward. 3*. “Borallans are primitive aliens who lived on a planet that was about to be destroyed because their atmosphere is going to disappear or something.” Worf was sent to investigate the planet, and his brother Kurn ends up marrying a Boraalan. Josh has a tiff about how Klingons don't seem to be observing the Prime Directive, and are showing favoritism. Kurn saves the tribe of his wife, but cannot save the rest of the species. So scientifically speaking this is an interesting episode because of trans-xenological corporeal genesis / sexual trans-xenological genesis. However, “The most fucked up thing though is that [Kurn] was spying on this woman for a long time before he had sex with her, and also that he is supposed to be a super genius, and she believes in magic and probably has never seen a toothbrush.” Observation of species is an important factor in the Prime Directive and first contact circumstances.

            Corvallen, Episode: Face of the Enemy. 3*. “These aliens look like weird rock creatures.” Here Joshua is contextual and descriptive, even going so far as to incorporate Dungeons and Dragons and Choose Your Own Adventure Books. Joshua is also interested in magic and differentiates between spell casting and something more occultish.

            Nara. Episode: Eye of the Beholder. 3*. “This alien has a weird looking forehead, but it's not nearly as fucked up as her nose.” I don't know why Joshua wants to go right back into sexist body shaming, but for the peaks of his humor of which I clearly haven't showcased … I mean he then seriously goes on to say that Troi imagines having sex with the Klingon Worf during the episode, and that is the least likely thing that would ever happen and then disses Troi again. My experience with Klingons is more like, “Let the Wookie win.” Joshua was clearly suicidal. The Klingon House of Mogue had not yet been granted honor...still, let the Wookie win. Daahmn....kid!

            Barkonians. Episode: Barkon Twine Own Self. 3*. “The Barkonians are sort of a midevil times type of alien.” Data is the hero of this episode, but Joshua is not happy with the results of Data's away mission to Barkon 4. Like the Boraalan, the Barkonians are a Prime Directive sensitive species of empirical interest. Here I cannot help but think of comparable socio-historical archetypes. Just the same Joshua manages a descriptive and accurate consideration of the episode, up until a point of course. Here he seems to have a nervous breakdown of anxiety. “It can get worse. It never stops getting worse.”

            Talarian. Episode: Suddenly Human. 2*. “These aliens are sexist and warlike, and even though they are constantly talking about how strong they are, when they are worried they make this really annoying whining noise like they are a bunch of stupid diaper babies.” A well-deserved two stars.

            Maturin. Episode: Sub Rosa. 2*. Joshua has a wonderful description here of the neo-Scottish, neo-patriarchal, neo-colonialists. Solid fucking gold kid! Instead of ragging, he makes comparable suggestions for a better interstellar neo-colonialism. He also modestly disses the Maturin [criticism,] without causing any interstellar diplomatic complications. That kid had a future in Starfleet! It's nice to be proud of Joshua during a difficult time in his life rather than be concerned and frustrated.

            Darsay. Darsay System. Episode: Masks. 2*. “...I think that once a civilization gets smart enough they should probably stop thinking the the sun is a god, especially if they have spaceships.” Data has a metaphysical journey in this episode, and works with Geordi to problem solve. Data becomes possessed by an ancient alien library of a former species that appears as a comet and takes over the Enterprise. Joshua has thoughts of atheism, paganism, and a separate consideration on schizophrenia / multiple personalities. Data did get five stars. It is enough for Joshua to admit that he thinks about schizophrenia, anxiety, and talks about self-harm. He is particularly lucid here. 

            Lumerians. Episode: Man of the People. 1*. “This dude is an asshole.” Lumerians channel their thoughts in certain ways. When the leading Lumerian channels negative thought to Councelor Troi, she gets bitchy. He talks about his passions for magic. He is interested in Wiccanism. He makes a comparison analysis with the comic The Sandman, and can appreciate the captivation of arcane imagery. He believes magic may be a catalyst for catharsis. He then goes on to say that the leading Lumerian had basically done just that. Joshua was so backwards sometimes. He was sooo right, and then sooo wrong. It is frustrating.

            Haliian. Home Planet: Halii. Episode: Aquiel. 1*. “This lady is awful. I don't even understand how she got accepted into Starfleet. She is boring and annoying and irrational and the special effects makeup that lets you know she is an alien is just two tiny bumps on her forehead. [Engineering Commander,] Geordi falls in love with her, but whatever, Geordi falls in love with computer women all the time. That is basically his thing. Plus she tries to have weird crystal sex with him which is obviously a horrible idea because we JUST SAW the weird Lumerian dude cast spells this way like ten episodes ago.” [Like scared of a bad voo-doo result.] This time I have to agree completely with Joshua. It's been a long time since I've seen the episode, but a pretty big bell was ringing. I sort of just think that I can only hope for the longevity of the Haliian species after that. With the Haliian I have to wonder if this psychology is unique to the individual or the species as a whole. I hope she does okay, Starfleet always is recruiting new member species. The needs of the many, outweigh the needs of the few. Live Long and Prosper!

            Kes/Prytt. Home Planet: Kesprytt. Episode: Attached. 1*. “At first we think the Prytt are going to be assholes and the Kes are okay, but then you find out that both of them are fucking stupid.” … “They just constantly shoot themselves in the foot because they are unwilling to let go of their paranoia, and anxiety, which is like the dumbest thing ever. All they have to do is not be paranoid and both groups would be fine, but they can't. They are assholes, and people almost die, and they can't even own up to the fact that it is their fault and maybe if they tried a little fucking harder things wouldn't be so bad, but instead they blame everyone but themselves. They just make things worse and then say it's the Federation's fault that this happen, but it was them. It was them and their fucking immature behavior that ruined everything.” With first contact there is no outlying guarantee that diplomatic successes will withhold. Joshua nails it with his somewhat juvenile rhetoric. I'm only leaving bits out of this one, but it is worth it if for the outside viewpoint of a frustrating and unsuccessful first contact mission. That's the thing though, there is no such thing really as long as the data is recorded and an honest attempt is made for the purpose of outreach. Again, 'keep it simple stupid,' is one thing, but 'stick to the science,' is also relevant for its similarity to simple, and purpose.

            I know this is what you've been waiting for. It’s the worst alien on Star Trek Next Generation! Ronin the Sex Ghost. Episode: Sub Rosa. 1*. “There are a lot of things going on with this alien. His name is Ronin, and his is at least seven hundred years old, and he lives in a candle, and his is made out of anaphasic energy but sometimes he can take human form, and the way he gets food is by having sex with the women in Dr. Crusher's family.” This one has trans-xenological consternations regarding rape and rape cultural phenomenology / sexism. As interesting as Ronin's metaphysical behavior might be, Joshua condemns him for hundreds of years of rape and misogyny. I felt similarity about this episode.

            Although I’m making a critique of the work of a young adult who lived in the past, there are some interesting considerations still to make. I’m hoping that an interview with the now forty year old Joshua will be enlightening, and my hope is that he continue the ‘zine to cover his now matured thoughts on all of the other Star Treks. The reason being is simply that his more juvenile activity was actually thought provoking and cathartic in some ways, and that that would be the point of Star Trek today. It helps us propel our imagination into new places for whatever good, for whatever reason. I want to end my critique with a look on where he may or may not have been descriptive enough in his body of work. His critique of Star Trek was bad or good overall. Young Joshua was either brilliantly descriptive if simplistic, or simply inadequate and lacking depth. I have three examples. A good point to make is how much better he was at it by the time he was preparing to exit high school, although at times to the loss of an unadulterated sense of humor. It can be assumed that overall his situation had not improved.

            Amarie. Episode: Unification 2. 3*.

“This alien works in a bar. She is sort of freaky looking, since there is no front to her nose, and she has weird things sticking out of her head. Also, she has four arms, which is probably why she decided to become a piano player. I think it would be pretty useful to have four arms, because then I if I broke one of my arms I would still be able to play video games with the other three. Sometimes I practice playing video games with my feet in case I do break on of my arms, that way I won’t have as much of a learning curve, but it hasn’t come in useful yet.” I was and still am way more into Klingons. I would have gone on and on about how she knew some Klingon tunes and how Worf has a good baritone, but overall Joshua was excellent enough in under embellishment in his description of Amarie the barroom pianist.

Bajoran. Planet Bajor. Episode: Ensign Ro. 4*. [Circa 1994.]

“Bajorans were aliens that had built impressive cities tens of thousands of years ago.” This is a Yes / No, as far as descriptive critique is from the younger Joshua that we by now must have some empathy for. Here he was both descriptive, and not descriptive enough. Ensign Ro is a rebel, and she eventually secedes from The United Federation of Planets, and joins The Maquis. This didn’t occur until later. There would be three episodes in STNG with this involvement. The Maquis are extremely relevant to the development to the later series, Star Trek Voyager. However, Voyager had not yet become a series, and would not be released until the following January.  The previous January Deep Space Nine had been released. For some reason Joshua did not relate the importance of their ancient spiritual beliefs, and how that relates to Bajoran bureaucracy. He did describe in a fairly well manner the fact that Bajor had been de-occupied from the Cardassians, and with a lot of help from the Federation. Here there are series of cross overs that he did not approach or for some reason didn’t bother with. There is a species etymology here that is incomplete and although I at first wonder why, despite his love for Ro [he mentions that she is a badass,] it becomes clear. After describing the occupation of Bajor, he makes a comparative analysis of The Crucible, where the Wizard decides there is no explanation worthy of the early American colonists, so as the Crucible Wizard is pressed to snitch or admit something, the Wizard simply tells them off, and is pressed by stones, more and more every time. [I hated the Wizard, and thought he was just another sad Patriarch, until the end,] The sad thing is [this is Episode Five, there are two more seasons and one more zine at this point,] is that this analogy is contiguous with the pressures that Joshua must tolerate as he accelerates into post-adolescence. About sixty percent of the review is his own analysis comparatively, and the rest is Ro or Bajoran. His critique of his mother might otherwise turn off the observer to his abilities as a writer and to any positive acclamation that he may have gained by following the series. 

            In these ‘zines Joshua somewhere shows a normative tentative young adult consideration regarding sexuality. There have been a few in my critique, this is likely another. In his first school assignment that started his zine process [the first was hand written, and at least another had use of a dot matrix printer,] Joshua described Data, but more importantly the relationship between Data and Lt. Commander Natasha Yar. Yar died. The alien that killed Yar is likely tied with the rape monster [‘Sex Alien,’] in his ratings. Joshua was mad. Data and Yar would have been the all that couple of the galaxy in Joshua’s mind at the time. However he is unable to acknowledge that a Yar/Troi coupling would have been just as good, if not completely better in a unilateral manner. [Horizontalism, intersectionality.] It is at least clear that Joshua put a lot of effort into this and had a lot going against him, he might not have been capable of thinking of all the angles, no one is.

            Josh, if you are out there anywhere, please contact me!

mongDech goes to Quark's in San Francisco [short story]

Zaoden of Andoran, Ta'an of Vulcan, and Gaardox of Qo'Nos got a table together at Quark's in San Francisco. Zaoden got a house porter, special to the region. Ta'an ordered a gin mint julep. Gaardox decided to sample the porter also. Discussion ensued regarding their tenure at Starfleet Academy and how it would not be possible for them to enjoy each other's company outside of the 25th century diplomatic systemic fleet protocol initiatives. Realizing the gin mint julep was a stronger drink, Gaardox complimented Ta'an on his virtue regarding mixology. Zaoden, an Andoran with a decent sense of humor chuckled at Gaardox's politeness. These Admirals and the general often fleet together and professorship is a nice break from normative duties. One thing that was noted was how diverse the applicants were this year, and how inspired they seemed, and ambitious! One cadet had just finished from the KDF Academy on the homeworld on Qo'Nos, and essentially desired trans-stellar xenological compliance in all areas, not simply as a career move, but as a method to quench curiosity. There was a Denebulan who had just finished at Vulcan Science Academy, and decided that fleet would be the wisest application for her new found knowledge. Another KDF Academy graduate decided to do one year at Vulcan Science, and another at Starfleet, then go back to Vulcan, and again Starfleet, in order to be the most well rounded. The officers were as inspired by their students as they them, and it seemed a libation was due at that time at the end of the week. The Ferengi bar tender at Quark's in S.F. was a little nervous to have them there, but offered freeze dried plantain and cashews just the same. Zaoden offered wisdom regarding how bravery is good for business. Ta'an simply offered a nod to that thought. Gaardox inquired of Ambassador Quark. The bartender couldn't understand, however the general was able to surmise that the Ambassador's location may have been secreted due to security purposes, and that seemed to create a polite impasse and offer some sense of confidence to the Ferengi, for which both the Vulcan and Andoran could appreciate. Gaardox understood other species discomfort with Klingons, and decided to simplify the situation. Not really interested in another week of multidimensional metaphysics, and how that applies to fleet phrenology, the three were easily interested in a second drink. As the Ferengi took the order, he noticed the Starfleet Academy notarized 'smart,' books essential to Academic duty, and asked no further questions. Using intuition and the general amicability of the triad, the Ferengi reversed the order. This time Ta'an could try the porter and the other two could enjoy the gin mint julep. It's an old bartender trick when the bartender realizes he or she is in the company of old friends. The Ferengi was also a Academy grad, and he moonlights for his family at Quark's when not committed to essential fleet duty. "Besides, otherwise I would miss Earth!" That is a typical come on line that only really applies to Quark's employees, but the triad laughed anyway, and since their laughter was genuine the Ferengi got them started on a game of domino's right away. Listening to the jukebox, playing dominos, eating freeze dried plantain and cashews, having a drink with friends. None of the officer's students were likely having as much fun, for morale purposes they would have to invite the inquiry regarding 'what they did over the weekend,' to ensure students have normative Academy experiences.